Hindi ko kailan man ninais ang mga ito. Dumating bigla ang mga bagay na kailanma'y di ko inakalang mailalapag sa aking mga kamay. Ninais ko bang lumigaya sa piling ng hinanakit? Sino ba ang gustong lumigaya nang higit pa sa kakayaning hapdi?
Ang puso ko'y tinuruan ko na. Ang isipan ko'y di kayang pigilan. Mapaglaro minsan ang mga ilusyon ng aking buhay. May nakapagsabi na bang mas makapangyarihan ang puso kesa sa isipan? O ito'y pantay lamang at pilit lang nang nating pinaghihiwalay ang kapangyarihan ng dalawa, o ng isa? May nakahihigit nga ba?
Heto nagagayak ako. Nagagayak akong mag-isip, sumulat at umasa. Ang dami pang nais kong nanaisin. Ang dami pang dapat ilathala. Darating man ang mga di inaasahan, di susuko ang isipan o ang pusong tanggapin ang anuman.
nagayak ako.
Monday, March 2, 2009
Monday, February 9, 2009
i counted a million stars
when i was about to say this is where i belong, these are the arms that would carry me through, this is my home, when i have to know that i have to look back and see nothing is left but me along the way.
i have counted a million stars, a million dreams to pair on each star i count. i made sure i counted more than enough so as not to lose any dream that burns out in every despair.
i beam a smile. for whatever. for anyhow? i don't know. just flashes of hope. to ease my way to somewhere uncertain. for home is where the heart is. as long as there are always stars, i'd never cease dreaming. i can count on the stars. can count on my dreams.
i have counted a million stars, a million dreams to pair on each star i count. i made sure i counted more than enough so as not to lose any dream that burns out in every despair.
i beam a smile. for whatever. for anyhow? i don't know. just flashes of hope. to ease my way to somewhere uncertain. for home is where the heart is. as long as there are always stars, i'd never cease dreaming. i can count on the stars. can count on my dreams.
Monday, February 2, 2009
Saturday, October 4, 2008
You think I'm going
How dare you look into my eyes, piercing my soul like a blade of grass swiftly slicing a dainty skin of a passer-by? This soul is nurtured by pain and the least that i need is a mortar of anguish from someone i thought would shelter me from this havoc of anxieties i built myself. Look deep inside me. I'm no valor. There's just no more bravery. I'm weary. I'm no better than a wasted heir of ruins.
And how dare you tell me you'll leave because i'm leaving. No way! I'm no inching a single step anywhere. Not anywhere you're not going. By this time you should have known me better. That i'm nothing without this tiny hope of love i keep within me. The only optimism left in me.
Teach me how to walk away from you. Teach me how you smith your heart and shield it from pain. i just don't know how.
And how dare you tell me you'll leave because i'm leaving. No way! I'm no inching a single step anywhere. Not anywhere you're not going. By this time you should have known me better. That i'm nothing without this tiny hope of love i keep within me. The only optimism left in me.
Teach me how to walk away from you. Teach me how you smith your heart and shield it from pain. i just don't know how.
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